Have you ever felt that you took  a step backwards in your life or feel that you failed altogether? The truth is…there is no failure. We all have things to learn and experience in this world and we will repeat the same patterns until we understand their lessons. If we do happen to take that backwards step we’re usually the ones hardest on ourselves. The stigma of disappointment and shame we inflict on ourselves and not that of repeating the lesson is what we must overcome. It’s been said that there is no judgement in the afterlife, so why are we so eager to judge in this one?

I’ve recently been witness to person who was struggling and had little. The saddest thing isn’t that their means are so scarce that they couldn’t afford to purchase a cold drink on a hot day, but the shame they felt once they realized they didn’t have enough money.  It was obvious that this individual believed that they weren’t as good as other people by the way they began apologizing for wasting the cashiers time. This isn’t the truth though… everyone has value and meaning.

It’s apparent to me that it is easy for us to pass judgement on others because we’re constantly judging ourselves. We recognize our perceived failures and shortcomings in someone else and  become critical. We see someone struggling with issues that we’ve got figured out and can’t imagine why they’re having such a difficult time. We are way to hard on ourselves and by extension others.  I think it’s time we gave ourselves and others a much deserved break and remember that we are all in this together. We have far more in common than we realize and I’d like to think that a kind word and a smile is the easiest way to heal our world.

Expectations

I thought that I would start my blog by sharing some channeled insight on expectations. Years ago I received a profound understanding of the subject and have been  recently feeling the need to share this information.

On a day, much like any other, while going about my normal routine my mind became unencumbered by the usual stresses that are placed upon us daily and I received that our expectations can keep us from being true to ourselves. It’s all too easy to fail to take an action that we feel strongly about because we fear how other people may react. Maybe you really like someone but sense that they don’t feel the same way so you don’t tell them how special they are to you because you think that you will create an awkward situation. Or perhaps you do something special for someone or go above and beyond at work…and no one notices. Just the idea of such adverse reactions can make us want to abandon the endeavor altogether.  When situations like this occur we tend to have our feelings hurt and some cases we may even become depressed. These are a result of our expectations not being met, but this doesn’t have to be the case.

If we can put ourselves aside for a moment and give of ourselves freely and in love then we will realize that our actions don’t require a positive response or even acknowledgment. You may be laying a foundation for the future or perhaps that person that you wish to compliment is masking the pain of a difficult situation and is in need of a kind word and some encouragement. Or just maybe, your actions or words are meant to inspire someone who simply may be a  witness to your courage and kindness.  But if we allow our expectations to control us and shut us down, we miss the chance to inspire both others and ourselves. Freeing ourselves of our expectations isn’t easy, but if we can work towards this goal we will discover that we will be happier and have much less stress in our lives.